Hollywood - The Devil's Cuisine Art

September 11, 1996.

Greetings from New York City!

I have just returned from a very nice visit to Seattle where I appeared at the "Bumbershoot" festival. About three thousand people showed up for my gig and I always enjoy a crowd. I performed the current version of "Wake Up and Smell the Coffee". Some people walked out, some people stood and clapped. Isn't this what we're all striving for?

Walked around the festival grounds and absorbed the vibes, which were laid back in a Woodstock meets the shopping mall sort of way. Which I liked. I get scared when the equation tilts too far either side.

Later on Kip Fagin drove me over to the Printer's Devil Theater production of "subUrbia" which was very funny and energetic. Full house, and I don't think anyone there was over thirty. The cast had a good time, it seemed to me and I definitely place this production in the top three I've seen. Seattle has a very healthy theater scene and it felt very good to immerse myself in it for twenty-four hours.

Hollywood - The Devil's Cuisine Art.

I mention Hollywood a lot on these pages. You might wonder, what is my resume in this hallway of hell? First of all I have been tempted down the path of the screenplay deal on several occassions. I have "been in development" (written drafts of screenplays) at Fox, Goldwyn, Paramount, Warners, and Universal. I've done uncredited work on films in production. I've written two films that were actually made, both adaptations of my plays. I've starred in four films ("Special Effects", "The Caine Mutiny Court Martial", "Talk Radio", "Under Siege II"), appeared in a few others ("Dolores Claiborne", "Naked in New York", "Substance of Fire", "Office Killer"). On the TV side of things, I've starred in a couple of TV movies, half a dozen TV shows. I have written a TV show that was produced ("High Incident") and one that wasn't (a variety show for Fox). I have worked with a number of stars and star directors.

But this is all sort of abstract. Below are some of the more concrete experiences I have had making movies.

Special Effects

My first scene on camera was in Larry Cohen's "Special Effects" which he wrote and directed. A classic non-union B-movie, "Special Effects" was about a demented film director (myself) who murders a young actress (Zoe Tamerlis), gets footage of the murder and tries to insert it in a film. As usual, Larry's script was bizarre and wonderful. (By the way, this is in 1983 before the dawn of the "independent" film movement we know now. Low-budget movies were just low-budget movies. At least this one was.) My character kills Zoe's character just as he's trying to have sex with her. (you might know Zoe as Abel Ferrara's "Ms.45" or as the young woman shooting dope with Harvey Keitel in Abel's "The Bad Lieutenent.") And yes, I'm spelling her name correctly. This is how she spelt it in my movie.

Needless to say, my first scene being a "bed scene", I had to be naked. I hadn't met Zoe before the big day, so I found her in make-up and asked her if she wanted to lay down some "ground rules" for our big naked sex scene. She threw me out of her dressing room. This was the beginning of the harmony we were to enjoy during this shoot. So we're in bed together, naked, except I'm wearing briefs. The cameraman keeps complaining that he can see my clothing. So I boldly whip off the briefs and suddenly everybody on the set has found this scene tremendously interesting. So does my dick. Needless to say, Zoe got offended by my natural reaction to her naked beauty. Things progressed from there until I got killed in my last scene.

Talk Radio

On my third day on "Talk Radio" Oliver Stone took me aside and told me very seriously that he had been watching the "rushes" and that the movie just wasn't working. He didn't know what to do, but the footage I had been in so far completely sucked. Then he walked away. Gave no solutions, just walked away. I wanted to cry. Anyway, we kept shooting and things got better. When it came to the final cut, all those first scenes were cut out. That's why you don't see my face in the first few minutes of the movie.

My First Screenplay

My first screenplay was for Fox. My solo shows were getting attention from people on the West Coast, so Scott Rudin (enfant terrible at the studio) made a deal for me to write a comedy in which I would star. So I wrote it. Sara Colleton was my executive. I'll never forget her words in her office: "The script is great. It's a very good first draft. Just needs a few changes." She then proceeded to take out the script, turned to page one and threw out every page I had written. Everything had to be re-done. I was aghast. Blown away. As I left her office (with the riding crop propped in the corner) she said "He leaves, his head bloodied but unbowed."

A Few Years Later

A few years later I worked for Fox again, in the TV division. I was to write a TV show in which I would star. I had a metal demo tape of a new band on the scene. The album hadn't come out yet. I gave Peter Chernin the tape and said this is what the show should be about. The attitude on this album. It was "Nevermind" by Nirvana. I wrote the show, it was rauchy and vicious. Of course, it wasn't made.

Dennis Hopper

I worked with Dennis Hopper. He was very nice. He invited me into his personal trailer where he was watching the scene in "True Romance" where he gets blown away by Chris Walken. I got the impression he's watched this scene a few times. "Sit down, sit down! Watch this! This is great!" He was so into it! Then BOOOOM!!!

Agents

I had an agent in Los Angeles when I was first starting out who said that if I got my hair straightened, my nose cut down a bit and changed my name, I would have a future in this business.

The same agent gave a party in his Beverly Hills home. He flew me out to LA because he wanted me to meet people. When I got to his house, he had me be the bartender at the party. Then when it was time to go to bed, I found him in my bed. I called a cab and split. Slept on a couch in the international departure lounge of LAX.

Career Moves

Something I try to avoid are "career moves", a tactic employed by most everybody sooner or later. A "career move" is when an actor/playwright/director/whatever makes something they don't have any enthusiasm for because the success of the thing may "move" their career "forward." It is a kind of pragmatism and of course it's neither a good or bad thing. However, when you do it, you have to live with it.

The culture wants artists to have pure motives. From Samuel Beckett to Liza Minelli, we want to believe that the artist is propelled to make their work because they love it so much, because they have to make the work.

But in fact, the artist must be the artist day in and day out, while the world moves on. So often creative people find themselves looking around, seeing others gainfully employed and themselves sitting fallow. Commonly, we creative people ask our friends for advice. And often, in the heat of the moment, these people are agents and managers.

If you had the x-ray eyes I have, you'd notice directors directing plays they don't like, actors acting onstage when they want to be in film, or film actors in television shows when they dream of being onstage. They're all making career moves, trying to goose a career into action.

And it works sometimes. Often it doesn't. A few years ago I accepted a role in a movie of the week "The Last Flight Out." My agent thought it would temper my sleazy image. Unfortunately it did nothing of the kind, since I sucked, the director hated me and the no one ever saw the movie.

I did however get to spend a month in Thailand. Which was my real reason for taking the job in the first place.

I am ambitious and I have big plans. As most grandiose people do. But I have to fight these tendencies with impulses that if not more pure, are more likely to lead me into some kind of aesthetic happiness. These impulses are simply to make work I love, work I'd love to see, or just have fun. I accept these impulses as spiritually pure. Life is too short to do otherwise. As Robert Altman said to me: "I have only so many films inside me, I'll make the ones I want to make." But then producers grew to dislike Altman because of his "attitude."

I feel very vulnerable when I work hard on something I love. Because disappointment in love is much harder to take than simple failure in endeavor. Just "doing a job" doesn't have as much risk in it. If art is reduced to making money or "careers" then it's simpler to understand. But who wants that?

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